Mind the Gap...

This weekend was a big one of transition. Noel left Ethiopia late Friday night. On Saturday, when I was reflecting on the four months behind us here, I felt sincere gratitude.

Fellow travelers- ones that run with you despite your weaknesses, annoyances, etc, are hard to find. Ones who will give you grace. My students last week were discussing a proverb: “love is blind.” Many said NO. They didn't agree because true love SEES all and yet still accepts. It's rare to find those family/tribemates who will run with you even when you fall....who encourage you, say the hard thing as needed, yet still believe in you and your potential. I'm grateful for Noel, she's a tribemate like that. And many others in my life have proven to be that as well and I'm grateful. May I also be that kind of family-tribemate for others. One who doesn't judge or give up or run away. The best brother-king-Lord of all, Jesus himself- models this commitment, this loyalty, this tribal love. I'm grateful He's FOR me. For US.

Again, so so grateful for Noel and the time God allowed us to share in Ethiopia together. I learned much from her example, her faith, her love for me, her love for others.

our final "taxi" ride in Addis

Noel with some of the Hope in View team-volunteers, her final celebration with them

In reflection on what God taught me over the past several months here, I must say probably the largest is an awareness of my own “GAPS.” My weaknesses...WOW...I'm not sure if being with a twin helps those become even more apparent, but I saw huge gaps in myself and it was startling. And humbling. I wrote this recently in my journal....

...maybe this is why you've called me to Africa now...because you want me to live where I have to depend on you. Where your nose fills with black and your feet crack and bleed from walking....where almost daily...you're reminded that you're a “forengie”- a foreigner...you're out of place. In the beauty of Africa, there's also the discomfort, the fatigue, the irritation, the rawness and inability to control things. Yet, you've called this for me now. How will I respond? In the fiery furnace, in the raging waters that are over my head, in the drought, in the darkness? Will I become walled off and spiteful? Or silenced? Or distant from all in self-preservation mode? Will I run away? Or fear? Or doubt? Or wallow in discouragement? OR will I rise and conquer? Will I lift my eyes to the hills- where YOU, my help comes from? Will I allow this to sink OR sharpen me...making my voice not weak but strong and loud as I sing despite the struggle? MAY I SING. MAY I LIVE FOR YOU. In Trust. May the joy of you with me always, be my strength. For you are here with me, my faithful companion. May I grip your hand and learn to listen to your voice more than ever before...For You, By You...

Yep...have definitely had some great dialog with God during these months because I've been humbled by so much.

Gaps...weaknesses, lack of things you need or feel you need, where you feel at a loss....are painful to realize.

But in thinking about this over the weekend, I'm still realizing...God helps us see our gaps for our GOOD. As we run on towards home...and grow in our relationship with God, I believe there is a need for constant:

1. GAP AWARENESS
2. GAP ANALYSIS
3. GAP FILLING

It's funny, all this brought to mind the term...“mind the gap.” I first heard this when a short-term team I was working with a few years ago- had an extended layover in Europe in route to Africa...and they took time in the city- but missed their connection. As we all pondered this later in retrospect...we noted the need to “mind the gap.” Give attention to the holes. The gaps. 

Here in Addis....there are many holes in the sidewalks. Literally, if you're not paying attention, you could disappear in a hole. :-) In Kenya, there was this bridge I would walk over to work every day, and it always seemed to be missing another plank each day. Wow, I had to pay attention. :-)

that crazy bridge in Nairobi :-)

GAP AWARENESS is a good thing. You see where the deficiencies are. And we all have them. A lack of skill or faith or something. We have gaps in finances, in education, in ability. So much. And paying attention to these is humbling and hard, but needed.

Gaps can swallow you. So gap awareness is good, then a GAP ANALYSIS is needed. Why is there a gap? Where did it come from? Did I cause it? Am I doing what I can to decrease it? How can it be fixed-filled? Am I putting other things in there to try to remedy it...are those things a real fix?

Then work to FILL THE GAP. The great thing here is- it's a partnership. Or can be. You have a part...and so does our ABLE and SOVEREIGN God.

I believe that to live responsibly, as a good steward of your time, resources, body, etc...you can put measures in place to help fill the gaps in your life.

God also knows your gaps. He sees them- no use hiding them.

And the amazing thing is as you put yourself in a position of humility and surrender, and work to do your part, He fills your gaps with what you can't do on your own. He can make you effective when you're in fact ineffective. It's relationship, there's two of you. Even as you run with gaps in faith or courage-as you can continue to step- He can STILL use you IN SPITE of you. You will always have gaps til home in heaven...because we live in a body and a world under the effects of sin and death...but God can lessen our gaps and He can partner with us to even make our gaps our strengths- our testimonies. What a God we serve!

Paul struggled with this gap stuff, but God taught him....

In your weakness, I am strong. (Romans 7:16-25) (2 Corinthians 12:9-10)

Satan likes to focus us on our gaps. But God is the gap filler.

We are overcomers. Greater is He that is in us than He that is in the world. (Romans 8:28-39) (1 John 4:4)

He IS all we need, to live, to love, to be what He needs us to be. Nuff said. :-)

My prayer for this new season here...in this gap awareness and analysis time for me- that I take it and allow God to shape me through it for His good. And that He uses me while in this process...for His kingdom.

some of my students...part of my new season here...

Thank you for praying me through, for your words/emails, etc of encouragement!!!!!  Even your comments on my blog mean so much to know you're listening, reading, praying!

Please continue to do so.

What an honor it is to serve, even with gaps. Onward...

Praises and Prayer Requests for This Week

-A praise for my sister Noel arriving safely back in the Czech Republic this past Saturday. Pray for her as she spends a week there then travels to the USA for the holidays. May her travel and reunion time with her Czech teammates-tribe be blessed. May she feel joy, peace and have provision for all God has been doing and wants to do in her time ahead.

-A praise for my moving. I moved to a new location yesterday- it's a place on the campus of the school I'm teaching at. What a blessing to have a place to stay.

-A praise for our concluding time of our four months with Hope in View- the organization we've been serving with . I was able to turn in my research and feel good about the continued relationships with these brothers and sisters.

-A prayer request for my continued countdown to Christmas in the USA- that I will be effective in teaching and building relationships. That God will give me courage and favor. My tickets to the USA for Christmas are purchased. I will be in Ohio- December 23-January 5. I pray a blessed time for my parents and sister as we're reunited for some holiday time and rest together.

-I do have appointments, a business visa that needs processed, more funding support to raise, etc, during this holiday time- so please pray favor there and that I can still enjoy time with my family and the wonderful Christmas season with all of that to do too.

-As this new season for me here in Ethiopia continues- that the gaps revealed in me will decrease and I'll do what needs done and allow God to do what needs done- to make me be the best I can be for God's glory.

Thank you again for your prayers!

My love to each of you this Christmas season!

Hope to see or connect with many of you stateside soon.

Blessings from Ethiopia,

Holly